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| i'm back...so you know what this means...stay tuned.
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| thanks grace, hope things go well and see you in october.
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| i really dont like the new xanga, its annoyingly cute and the 'homepage' looks too busy. oh btw i really love salty peanuts and beer.
anyways, in terms of weddings, this summer will be a record. i have been invited (i think) to THREE, yes, 1, 2, 3! weddings. congratulations to danny, scott, and kelly (ms. sam woo). unfortunately i will only be able to make 1 of them, and to be honest, i'm kind of bummed. not that the other 2 weddings aren't equally significant and important, but tonight i want to blog about scott's wedding. yup, scott 'chinese blue hat boy' lee.
it came as a surprise. i have not talked to scott since we parted ways back in high school. in the next 6 years we would run into each other no more than 4 times. its a pity what a girlfriend in high school can do to your social life. not saying i regret having a gf in high school, i just wish i knew how to handle it better.
so i get a facebook friend request (thank you Zack) and i see this chinese boy holding a sling shot. it wasn't the familiar face that surprised me but rather the message. "hey john chen is that you....blah blah blah...btw i'm getting married and i want you to come" i was shocked. considering my first 2 friends at UNI was scott lee and scott lee (i forget which one came first), this one hits close to home. i really want to go to his wedding but its unlikely at best. i certainly hope this is not something i'm going to regret.
am i really getting this old? my youth and i are very much like a jew and his $, it doesn't separate. but is it finally time, do i really want to be that guy who lives by himself when all his friends are married with children? i don't know, i can't answer that. however, i do know it's not going to happen anytime soon, at least not till after this summer.
man, three in one summer, its a new record.
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| wtf, xanga changed.
anyways i discovered that i study MUCH better with a nice bottle of pinot or as we have tonight, 2006 pillar box red (a mix of shiraz, cabernet, and merlot for $10. after living for almost a year in san diego, i've reached the conclusion that it's not for me. i need to leave. maybe it's because i'm in graduate school and i'm using a bias scale but i can't imagine anything here that will change my interest me. compared to where i've been/been living the past few years, this city is just too damn small. granted irvine is not exactly tokyo, but at least i was a 40 minute drive from LA. granted i have a love/hate, mostly hate, relationship with LA, there's better looking people. not that there isn't any good looking people in SD, its just rare. although i have to admit, i am quite attracted to this one girl in SD. i'm not sure if she's taken but that's never really stopped me.
speaking of girls, i stumbled across an ex-gf's facebook page. i was contemplating whether or not i should add her. in the end, i decided against adding her simply because i still find it hard to forgive myself for what i did to her. i ddin't cheat, i never do, i was just too young. from her pictures she looked like she was with someone else and enjoying life and the last thing she needs is a harsh reminder of what happened or could happen again. i really hope i get to work in shanghai this summer, i love asia, can't imagine living anywhere else.
peace.
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| I'm going to start blogging again, only this time I don't really care if anyone actually reads or comments.
I have a soft spot for old people, especially old homeless people. I was at the corner of Frazee and Friar today when I saw an old lady holding a sign that read "HELP ME". I felt extremely sorry for her simply because she was easily mid 60 to 70 and still had to stand in the cold to beg for money. I gave her what I could and left. Usually the intersections are littered with individuals in their early to mid 40's with signs that start off with "Homeless Veteran...[insert life story here accompanied with misspelled words]. God Bless you." I almost never give them money unless they are a multiple amputee, and their disadvantage will affected their marketability in the workforce. Any individual in their early to mid 40's individual with all his/her limb can work another 20 or so years. They should contribute to society and work. Even if it is a low paying, demeaning, and labor intensive job, it' still something. I will never give them a penny.
The next story I need to write only because I haven't felt like this in awhile. Over winter break I stuck to my Chinese heritage and went to Las Vegas for the holidays. Friday night started off on the weak side because the first club we went to sucked and afterwards we decided to go to Tao for only three hours. It ended up being one of the best decisions. It was extremely crowded and I was not having run until my friend (with his newfound courage, assisted by large amounts of alcohol) started to talk to any and all girls he ran across. We struck gold when he started talking to these three girls, one whom is named Kim. First and foremost, she didn't just blow us off like most LA girls. Secondly, she actually took the time to talk to us and get our names. Maybe its a Canadian thing. Oh did I mention she's Canadian? Needless to say things will probably get nowhere because I still have doubts that Canada even exist (kidding).
Although our conversation was limited, she seemed like a cool person. The fact that she was extremely physically attractive only made the night better. I can't really remember what we talked about due to the alcohol but it had to be somewhat meaningful if she was willing to give me her number and take some pictures with us. (Omitting reasoning for why I find her so attractive for space purposes). Since returning home/San Diego, I've developed that "butterfly in the stomach" feeling even though I know nothing will ever happen. I haven't had this feeling in a VERY VERY long time (emphasis on "very"). If things got further, it would be nothing short of amazing. Yes, she does live in Canada and it probably doesn't even exist, but deep down inside I'm a hopeless romantic and I believe anything will work if you're just willing to try.
Personally I think long distance is kind of awesome. I like the feeling of waiting for that special someone at the airport with a gift while being harassed by airport security. I like the feeling of hand writing, personalizing, and snail mailing a letter to that special someone. I like the feeling of getting that random simple yet sweet text message from that special someone you know you'll see in three months. When you see a person frequently, you undoubtedly lose the "puppy love" period faster and things end up routine and predictable. In the end, nothing will happen. Kim will just be some girl, at some club, some time ago, who kind of meant something to me.
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